"Today,... we are gathered here..... here... here.. (echo echo... *silent...) to applaud one of the most prestigious awards.... awards.. awards.. (echo echo... *2 x coughs) that Her Majesty sees fit to bestow... Sir Uncle Steven!! (Hurrahhhhhhh!! *crowds gone wild...) Sir Uncle Steven kissed the Queen's hand and turn towards the crowd.... (Still hurrahing.... *camera flashings...) lift ups his hand and wave to the crowd, then comes the loud bang! The explosions! The super pyrotechnic special effects! Sir Uncle Steven grace down the stage, back to the hallway along the red carpet. Fans cheering, pushing their way, trying to knock down the wall of the well built bodyguards. Ok, ok. Most of the fans are female. Ok ok ok... Most of the fans are young attractive females. Ok, ok, OK!!!! ALL OF THE FANS ARE YOUNG ATTRACTIVE SEXY FEMALES!!!!!! Happy NOW? *continues... One fan broke through and ask for my signature. I toke out a pen ask ask which picture of she wants me to sign. And she said, "Sign here." I was shocked. I gasped. But I signed. Then she whined "But, but they are twins..." Being a gentlemen as I am, I signed one more time. I told her that I have never sign on something like this before and I expressed my awkward feeling. She ensure me that its ok and because she loves them so much, and she hopes that I will love them too. What can I say.... I am a man. No, a GENTLEMEN! So I offered a kiss beside the signatures. Then the crowd lets out a sweet (Awwwww......) I pat my lips dry and continue to waltz away. The lady shouted "Will I see you again? Soon?". I told her that I would love to play with her twins sometime too, but being a Sir, is not a simple chore. I told her to take care of herself and her beautiful twins. As I marched and marched towards the car, I looked back. The beautiful lady wave a vigorous goodbye and so did her.... twins..... jumping up and down waving to me simultaneously. What a touching sight. I shed a tear. And got into the car. I explained this sensational encounter with my driver and he refused to believe, and said that there is no such beautiful lady in the world that would ever let me sign on their daughters forehead. I chuckled and said, "Jimmy..... you'll know you're a man, when you're a man. I am old now. These things will happen to me like at least twice a day from now on....Yes... from now on...." - *music starts... (James Bond theme)
I officially declare myself Uncle Steven now. You know... you must be old and senile enough to some up with the above shit... right? hehe
Monday, May 19, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
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